"Stars Are Pretty"

Here i am again, two entries in one day...I'm on a role! So I had a pretty good day, i finished cleaning my apartment and the next thing im gonna have to tackle is my laundry EEP! I'm not sure exactly when im going to tackle that beast but it will be soon enough, cause im gonna run outta clothes. So getting back to my day very productive, then i had a small area of time where i just kinda relaxed and didnt do anything at all and i loved it. Helped mum decorate the tree, watched some simpsons, had a visitor for a little while and that was especially nice. Considering who it was and how much i like to spend time with him. Its funny how life works out, one day your ready to just give up and live in a slump and be miserable but then you realize the great people you have in your life and how much they care about you and just how much fun it can be to be with them. I'm gonna go ahead and say that i think i have the best friends in the world and are always there when i need them, even if im being completely stupid and annoying they are always there to tell me "hey your being completely stupid and annoying" AND I LOVE IT! Then one of those KEY people set me up (in a way) with her mans buddy, and its pretty much been the coolest thing to happen in a while, its made me so happy and not because there is a person in my life (in a way) but WHO the person is. Someone who can make me laugh hysterically and joke around with, and on top of all that has the kindest heart. I just feel, good about myself and that rarely happens. I mean i even enjoy just sitting on my porch smoking a butt with him, and thats something that shouldnt be like "oh man i totally love doing this!" but haha with him it can be. Yes i have started rambling, but i think i needed too haha. I'm gonna call it a nite and sleeeep

It's been a little while since i've written, but i havn't been able to sleep at my apartment due to heat issues, and didn't feel like dying of hypothermia. At least not this week, but all is fixed and im finally back home. Ive actually had a pretty good week, i met some new people and spent time with them and i've really enjoyed it. I never noticed how down i was before and refused to go out and do anything. I don't exactly know the cause of it but what i do know is that has passed and im back to my bubbly active self, wich makes life alot easier to live and enjoy. Last night i had a great time with my cousin who is basically my little sister. She's home from school for the Holidays and im pumped! We attempted to build a gingerbread house last night and needless to say, we will never get jobs as contractors or architects. The house is on a slant and the roof doesnt even touch where its supposed to. Then we tried to use the 100% sugar filled frosting to paint the "snow" and that was another catastrophe, but all and all it was hilarious and we enjoyed it. Then we watched Benny and June with Johnny Depp (yum!). That movie is so adorable it kills me, its full of humor and complete pure and inocent love, wich im sure is what every girl wants! I gotta get back to cleaning my apartment, wich has taken me all morning so far and im not even done. Who knew such a small living space could get so messy and cluttered?

Well this is my first journal entry on live journal, i finally figured out how to use it. I cant seem to fall asleep (not that i have tried yet) but i just know as soon as i go to lay down and my head hits the pillow, the race will begin. My head will fill with everything that i am worried about all at once and my mind will race, and repeat things that were said to me or things i have said, or possibly events that have happend over the week or even the month! So instead i sit up awake all night until finally i cant take it anymore and pass out leaving only a max of 2-3 hours for sleep. There was a time when i could rest easy and get the sleep my body needed, and my racing mind would shut up and worry about the woes of my life later. That time was a great time, i was happy with the way my life was going and i was doing things that were at least productive and led to a good future, but now i am not really being that productive (in a good way) i am still happy in general because i have great friends and i go out with them quite often wich is always a good time. Though im not working towards anything anymore and that makes me feel, well kinda lame ha ha to be honest. On top of all of that i lost a very important part of my life recently and its affecting (effecting?) me in a terrible way. I brought the loss upon myself of course (wich doesnt help me feel any better about the person i am) but i guess in a way it has helped me to step back and look at how im acting, and change some things. I could probably sit here and ramble on for hours, but i dont want to write a book tonite. Maybe another night :), so i am off to find something else to do for a bit before my "crash".